Fast Freddie
Posts: 328
Joined: 5/10/2005
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> > Four Great Short Stories!
> >
> > Here are a few military comebacks...
> >
> > ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> >
> > When in England at a fairly large conference, Colin Powell was
> > asked by the Archbishop of Canterbury if our plans for Iraq were just an
> > example of empire building' by George Bush.
> >
> > He answered by saying, 'Over the years, the United States has
> > sent many of it s fine young men and women into great peril to fight for
> > freedom beyond our borders. The only amount of land we have ever asked for
> > in return is enough to bury those that did not return.
> >
> > It became very quiet in the room.
> >
> > ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> >
> > Then there was a conference in France where a number of
> > international engineers were taking part, including French and American.
> > During a break one of the French engineers came back into the room saying
> > 'Have you heard the latest dumb stunt Bush has done? He has sent an
> > aircraft carrier to I n donesia to help the tsunami victims. What does he
> > intended to do, bomb them?'
> >
> > A Boeing engineer stood up and replied quietly: 'Our carriers
> > have three hospitals on board that can treat several hundred people; they
> > are nuclear powered and can supply emergency electrical power to shore
> > facilities; they have three cafeterias with the capacity to feed 3,000
> > people three meals a day, they can produce several thousand gallons of
> > fresh water from sea water each day,
> > and they carry half a dozen helicopters for use in transporting
> > victims and injured to and from their flight deck.. We have eleven such
> > ships; how many does France have?'
> >
> > Once again, dead silence.
> >
> > ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> >
> > A U.S. Navy Admiral was attending a naval conference that
> > included Admirals from the U.S. , English, Canadian, Australian and French
> > Navies. At a cocktail reception, he found himself standing with a large
> > group of Officers that included personnel from most of those countries.
> > Everyone was chatting away in English as they sipped their drinks but a
> > French admiral suddenly complained that, 'whereas Europeans learn many
> > languages, Americans learn only English.' He then asked, 'Why is it that
> > we always have to speak English in these conferences rather than speaking
> > French?'
> >
> > Without hesitating, the American Admiral replied 'Maybe it's
> > because the Brits, Canadians, Aussies and Americans arranged it so you
> > wouldn't have to speak German.'
> >
> > You could have heard a pin drop
> >
> > ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> >
> > AND THIS STORY FITS RIGHT IN WITH THE ABOVE...
> >
> > A group of Canadians, retired teachers, recently went to France
> > on a tour. Robert Whiting, an elderly gentleman of 83, arrived in Paris
> > by plane.
> >
> > At French Customs, he took a few minutes to locate his passport
> > in his carry on. "You have been to France before, monsieur?" the customs
> > officer asked sarcastically.
> >
> > Mr. Whiting admitted that he had been to France previously.
> >
> > "Then you should know enough to have your passport ready."
> >
> > The Canadian said, "The last time I was here, I didn't have to show it."
> >
> > "Impossible. Canadians always have to show your passports on
> > arrival in France !"
> >
> > The Canadian senior gave the Frenchman a long hard look. Then he
> > quietly explained. "Well, when I came ashore at Omaha Beach on D-Day in
> > '44 to help liberate this country, I couldn't find any Frenchmen to show
> > it to.
FF
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